Things That Now Make Me Cry

 Since I got pregnant, all of my emotions are in hyper drive. I am generally either spitting mad, weeping, or asleep. Since some pretty weird things make me burst into tears faster than the speed of light, I figured I might as well make a list so all may laugh.

1. Olive Garden commercials. It is just fantastic that they have bottomless salad and, my gosh, it's so beautiful.
2. Clothing. Just seeing clothes makes me incredibly sad.
3. When everyone works together on the popular sitcom "The Office". I have included a link to a clip that really got to me. I suggest you have tissues handy if your emotions have been toying with you lately.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ongGVLypHrA
4. James going to work.
5. The shower. I haven't figured that one out yet.
6. The thought of painting my toenails. It's really hard!
7. Harry Potter. I just love it so much!
8. Cats. They just don't care about anything.
9. Star Trek. They mess with your mind like nothing you people have ever seen.
10. Every movie I've watched since getting pregnant. A lot of work goes into those, it must be very difficult.

My Life

 It is now time to do a post about what is actually happening in my life. My husband James and I are living in Utah for the summer before we move to the UK for grad school. He is working and I am impossibly useless during my pregnancy. It's our first child so we kind of have no idea what is going on. Thus far I've lost too much weight and not been able to get out of bed for weeks at a time. Since I cannot contribute I thought it was time I started a blog. Pregnancy makes one slightly angry at what one feels are injustices in the world, so that is what I have decided to write about. It also gives me something to do when I'm sitting for hours at a time. Now I sometimes have an entire day where I keep all the food down that I eat so I can actually read and type without dying. Enjoy my thoughts.

"Birther" Claims

    It is now time for all you "birthers" to gather round and sit in my judgment circle. Think for a minute guys, there are insanely rigorous background checks for almost everything these days. In order to be a member of some police forces every member of your family must be investigated and, my gosh, the last time I got a library card I practically had to go through a criminal/credit check. I'm fairly certain that if the man who was running to be the leader of the free world wasn't born in the dang country, someone would have noticed and he would have been forced out of the race. Elementary school children know you have to be born an American citizen to be president, they weren't going to let anyone slip through.
    Now, on to what you should be attacking, and if a single person mentions his ears I will go crazy on them. How much experience in government did this man have before being elected president? I do realize that one of the key words in that last sentence was "elected", meaning he was chosen fairly in a very specific process. I also realize that half of his campaign centered around how proud he was to be a black man in America. The guy is half-white, he effectively alienated an entire race of which he is a part! I find it highly offensive that he played up being a black man and all the struggles his race has had to endure when he is a Harvard educated man who ignores his own heritage. I refuse to be ashamed for being white, middle class, or educated. We all need a leader, and we need a leader who is ready to represent America, not just a single class. He may have been born here, but that does not mean he is fit to lead the nation.

Disaster in a Blue Dress

Oh, Kate Hudson. I know there is a ton of pressure on you to be thin no matter what, and for years you have worn the men's shirts that prove you have no chance whatsoever at curves. Guess what though, you ARE growing a human and that makes everyone at least a little fat. Just because your tummy is growing does not mean you have to throw on an old shirt of Andre the Giant and hide, but you do need to get a little bit of a grip. If you put on a dress and the hooker straps at the back are straining against your blossoming belly instead of a smooth back, you have a problem. By wearing such a dress you immediately transform from a stylish star in a skanky dress to a normal skank and, really, who wants that? Take a look over the way at Natalie Portman, who wears elegant draping dresses that make me want to give her a baby gift instead of clawing my eyes out. You can be stunning while pregnant, but you cannot make people smile warmly while wearing a tight cocktail dress made for a woman with the measurements of a ten-year-old boy.